Sunday, December 2, 2012

Am I a proper wargamer?


Been saving this for a slow week.  As I've come down with some kind of rampaging grot, and painting has consequently slowed to an even more snail-like pace than usual, this seems like a good time for self-evaluation and navel gazing.  The post meme made the rounds a while back, even before the Liebsters took the blog-o-sphere by storm.  As best as I can tell, this appears to be the original source.  The basic idea is to test yourself against the criteria for being a "proper" wargamer, though I note a distinctly "Sons of Albion" bent to the questions ;)

* Spent at least £500 on figures / tanks - and you get extra kudos for every £500 you've spent

Easily, though I suppose it depends on your definition of "spent".  I tend to sell armies, and have been able to fund purchases through the sale of past purchases.  I prefer to think of it less as spending, and more in terms of an investment cycle ;)

Me and uncle Pennybags.

* Pricked your finger or thumb on a pike block - several times

Yep.  Worst for this was a couple units of 6mm successor pike I did a ways back.  Used pins with the heads trimmed off, and skewered myself more times than I could count.

* Tried at least 10 different rule sets and vowed never to play half of them ever again

Meeting the "tried" part is pretty easy.   WFB (multiple ed.), 40k (multiple ed.), Warmaster (fantasy and historical), Polemos Naps, DBA, Might and Reason, Warmahordes, Impetus, FoW (multiple ed.), Maurice, Lasalle, HoTT, Bolt Action, SBH, etc.  Not many I'd swear off of, though.  To be honest, I tend to play what's available to play in the local community.  Getting in a meh game with good people is better than getting in a good game with meh people, and both are generally better than not getting in a game at all.

* Bought an army off EBay

Not a complete one, or a painted one.  I've certainly bought an army's worth of figs, usually one batch at a time.

In between purchases of geek bling.

* Sold an army on EBay
Yep, several times.

* spent months painting an army - then used it in anger once

Once, or maybe twice.  Did this with my 6mm DBA Indians, and I think I got in 2 games with my 6mm napoleonic French.  Warhammer Dwarves, too, as I recall.

* tried several different periods and genres


* dropped a box of figures on the floor from a great height

Not a box.  Dropped a warjack once, and an eldar Wraithlord was knocked off a 3-4' high table by an opponent.  I am, however, the king of pinning, so all was well.

* lost a battle on the last throw of the dice

Sure.  Won them that way too.  Generally, either way, my favorite games.  When things are that tight, you know you're having fun.

* made at least one enemy for life

Over a game of toy soldiers?  No.  Over other things?  Yes.

* had a proper, stand up argument over a wargamers table

I usually opt for the "roll off, settle it later" option.  I just can't see getting so emotionally invested in toy soldiers that it'd be worth the stress.  I also tend not to game with people that take their recreation this seriously.  I mean, disagreements, sure, but a "yo mama" level of escalation?  No.

* thrown a dice across a room

Not on purpose.  I do fumble them on a regular basis, with occasionally comic results.

* rebased an army for a different rule set

Not yet.

* inflicted a whopping defeat on an opponent

Sure.  My first couple of games of SBH for example.

* suffered an embarrassing defeat due to a stupid tactical decision

Sure.  My last couple of games of SBH, for example.

* joined a wargamers club

That most wondrous agglomeration of gentlemen, the THMG.

* bought a ton of lead that remains unpainted

I fear not the Keeper


* been to a wargamers show

Games Day, years ago, when they still had one in Toronto.  Still want to go to Gencon, but the last time I tried, I ended up in court.  Long story.  

* have more dice than is logical or necessary to own - and have used most of them

Yep.  In point of fact, my kids have more dice than it is logical or necessary to own.  Cub started his collection at birth ;)

* have taken boxes of troops down to a club just to show them off to your mates

On a regular basis.

And there you have it.  Not sure if this qualifies me as "proper", but most of these criteria are eerily familiar.


  1. Haha, great post and answers. Very enjoyable read.

  2. Enjoyed the answers - and the use of Scumbag Steve!

  3. Nice answers and you do indeed sound like a proper wargamer to me!


  4. Good answers and fun pics as well. Yeah, you're a proper wargamer.

  5. Queue 1990s MC Hammer voice saying "PROP-A!" That means you passed. And I'm afraid your going to have to wear the MC Hammer pants as well. It's all part of the package.

    1. I'll have to dig through the closet. I'm sure there's at least a few youthful embarrassments in there ;)

  6. Definitely a proper wargamer! Now we need par t2!